Simple Ways to Make Divorce Easier on Your Kids
The fact of the matter is that divorce is never easy. Whenever there is a separation of two people, especially if there are kids involved, it will be a complicated process. It’s often hard for children to understand why their parents are no longer together, so explaining divorce to children can make it even harder. However, there are some things that parents can do to try and make the process of marital separation more tolerable. When it comes to your children, here are some simple ways to make divorce easier on your kids.
Keep in Touch Easily with Social Media
There may be some negative aspects to social media, but if used in the right way, especially during and after a divorce, it can be an easy and positive way for families to stay in touch. Unfortunately, after a separation, there may be long periods of time where one parent goes without seeing their child. Through social media, the non-custodial parent has an easy way to make sure they stay updated on the events in their child’s life.
Social media and texting also provide a simple way for parents to maintain consistent communication with their child when they are not around physically. By sending a text or social media message, a parent can show that they are there for the child without much effort or interference from the other parent. In the same way, social media and text conversations allow the child to have a direct line of communication with each parent without having to disclose all discussions to the other parent.
Don’t Argue in Front of the Kids
This may seem like a no-brainer, but in the heat of the moment, it may be easy just to start or continue an argument while your child is nearby. This is a huge mistake that can have lasting consequences on their emotional health and future relationships. Children are constant observers, and they are learning from their parents subconsciously each day. If their first and only role models are always fighting and angry, they will carry that sentiment with them throughout their lives.
Make it easier on your child or children by saving the arguments for times when you are alone with your ex-spouse, or go through an attorney to handle any legal or financial discussions.
Minimize Disruptions to Your Child’s Routine
In a time when your child’s whole life is changing, it’s important to maintain consistency wherever you can. This may mean ensuring that your child continues to participate in after-school activities or that you have a family dinner with your child each night. Whatever efforts you can make to ensure that your child has a consistent home life will go a long way in helping them get through the divorce.
Your child will go going through complicated feelings and emotions that they have never had before when there is a family separation. It’s important that you validate and legitimize your child’s feelings. They may not even understand why they are feeling sad or angry, but it’s important that you don’t tell them to “suck it up” or to get over the fact that they are losing a parent in the home. Divorce can be an extremely traumatic event in a child’s life, and it’s essential for them to have the emotional support of both parents.
Divorce is hard on everyone, so it’s important that you, as parents, get the help you need to handle your new life in an emotionally healthy way. It’s hard to take care of someone else if you are not taking care of your own emotional needs, so seek professional help if you need to. If you feel that your child would benefit from therapy with or without you, this is also a positive way to help your child handle the internal changes that occur with divorce.
Any time there is a familial separation, you should contact an experienced family law attorney. Your attorney can help you navigate the legal complexities of divorce so that you can focus on taking care of your children and home life.
One Plus of Texting, Social Media: Divorce Made Easier on Kids. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.usnews.com/news/health-news/articles/2019-02-26/one-plus-of-texting-social-media-divorce-made-easier-on-kids
Lyness, D. (Ed.). (2015, January). Helping Your Child Through a Divorce (for Parents). Retrieved from https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/help-child-divorce.html